Mah First Day

Last night my stress levels were through the roof! My head was filled with ridiculous worries that my car wouldn't start this morning and I would miss my first day of nursing school, or I would forget some crucial document and would be kicked out of the program. Ya know, absolutely ridiculous thoughts. I double and triple checked everything and I hardly got a wink of sleep last night because I was just so nervous. Is anyone else like that before they start something new or is it just me?

It doesn't help that my whole life I have had this reoccurring nightmare that I realize half way through the school year that there's all these classes I was supposed to have been going to that I somehow didn't know about and I end up being WAY behind all the other students and end up failing. I have no idea why I always have that dream but I seriously do all the time, whether I am in school or not. Anyone want to analyze that one for me?

Wouldn't you know it though, the stars aligned this morning and my car did indeed start, I got to school on time, I made it through orientation and I even got to know some of my awesome classmates. First day of nursing school was a success and I made it through relatively unscathed!

All my worries were for naught.

Now I am feeling more on the excited end of things, thank goodness.

I have to say that five years ago, heck - even three years ago, I would have never guessed that I would end up in nursing school, but I am really glad that it worked out that way. I kind of feel like I got led into it, ya know? I don't know which of you guys believe in a higher being, but this is definitely one of those moments for me where I feel like God nudged me in this direction, even if it wasn't what I had originally wanted, but I feel at peace that it is the best place for me, and I am quite happy with it.

Strange how that works.

bits and pieces.

 

Lately I have felt in desperate need of a vacation to some far-off place. I have been stressed out and tired and scared and nervous. A jumble of all sorts of unpleasant emotions. I have allowed small things to get the better of me and I am ashamed of it. I guess you could say I have been feeling overwhelmingly human. 

I have so many goals and dreams and ideas and this cold winter has kept me trapped in my apartment forgetting to accomplish so many of them. I have lost sight of what is important, I have gotten a little lost, and I am tired of feeling that way.

Tomorrow is my last day at my job, and next week I begin nursing school. I want to take full advantage of this big change and grab life by the horns and turn it into what I have always dreamed of it being.

I want to purge myself of fear, doubt, and stress.

I want to fill myself with faith, trust, hope, and joy.

I want to refocus my vision on the truly important things in life. I want to renew my relationship with God, I want to take better care of my body, I want to strengthen my marriage, and work on refining my good qualities and smoothing out the bad. I want to surround myself with good company, and fill my time with meaningful activities. I want to get rid of all the bad vibes in my life. I want to change.

I'm not really a new year's resolutionist but it seems like this post is sort of going that direction, isn't it? I suppose I have hopped on that bandwagon after all.

"Don't worry! It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out in the end. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. the Lord will not forsake us."

- Gordon B. Hinckley

"When things go bad, don't go with them."

- Elvis Presley

"Try a little harder, to be a little better."

- Gordon B. Hinckley

              "Create a life that feels good on the inside, not one that just looks good on the outside."

Hello, friends.

// Hip-hip hooray for a brand new year. I'm actually quite excited for this one, mainly because I am going to nursing school (in like, one week, ahhh.) and I cannot wait. Another cool thing is that Nathan starts diesel mechanic school in June, so three cheers for school.

// Mainly I'm thrilled about some change, I was getting burnt out and needed to head a different direction and feel like I've finally found that direction.

// A not cool thing about the new year is the gym for like.. the next 3 weeks. There is a wall of sweat that accumulates and drips down on all the windows from all the extra sweaty bodies. Ick.  I'm just going to sit quietly in my home until all the new year's resolution-ers fall of the wagon. Am I a terrible human for saying that?

// I am getting a new couch today. It is like this rust colored velvety number that used to belong to my great grandparents. So in reality it's actually a very old couch, but I'm excited about. Our current couch, as lovely and plaid as it is, is in need of replacement.

// This friday is my last day at my job as a therapy aid! It is bittersweet. I am going to really miss all the old people that I work with and love, and I'll miss my coworkers as well. I mean I've been there for almost two years now, and I've grown rather attached. But it's simply time to move on.

Wishing you all the best of Saturdays.

Peace Out.

2 Years

Two years ago, on December 29th, 2012, Nathan and I were wed. Since that time, we've been on lots of different adventures together.

We've lived in two different states, two different homes, and have had several different jobs. We've both been in and out of school, we've shed lots of tears, and lots of kisses too. 

When I look back on this time I can't believe how quickly it has gone, but I am grateful for every single one of those seconds I've spent as a married person.

In the past two years I've realized that I have big weaknesses that I never even knew about before, but Nathan is the most patient man on the planet to put up with them! I have also learned that he is the only one I'd ever want to share this life with. He is a sweetheart, and is always thinking of others, and me. He brings out the good in me, and helps me be a better person. I love that man with all of my heart.

A lot has changed in these two wonderful years, and I am so excited to see what other changes life has in store for us in the years to come.

Being married is the best, guys. It's tough sometimes, but it is so worth it.

Eventful Holiday Shtuff

// It is really much too late to compose any sort of an organized post, so here's a nice bulleted list for ya.

// Last weekend my parents took a bunch of us to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas Concert. I have been to several of these over the years and I must say this one was my favorite. The Sesame Street Muppets came and performed with the choir. I mean who doesn't love Elmo, ya know?

// It's my birthday today. I'm officially 22 years old and honestly I have no clue how I feel about it. Get back to me in the morning and maybe then I will have some idea.

// I feel like there is always one person every Christmas who totally stumps me and I am left with no idea what present to buy them. It happens to be this same person every year that I struggle with, too. What do you get someone who already has everything they want, huh? Does anyone else out there know how I feel on this particular matter?

// I really like blue Christmas lights. They are my favorite flavor. Or color. Whichever. It's late.

// Ooo! I bought a new bedspread, and I am extremely thrilled about it. We've had this big IKEA giftcard sitting around for the past two years and I only just decided today to put it to good use.

nighty night.

Tradition

This will only be the third Christmas Nathan and I have shared together, so I mean it's not like we have developed too many solid holiday traditions yet. One thing we have been consistent about though, and something that I want to continue, is we each pick out one new ornament for our tree each year!

If you are from the Utah County area - we went to a Color Me Mine-esque place called Creativity by the University Mall this year for our ornament-pickin'. To you non-Utahns, it's essentially this little ceramics place where you can go and glaze cool stuff and they'll fire it for you and you take it home. It's pretty much awesome.

So TA-DA! The above are our 2014 ornaments. Nathan's is the lovely little tree on the left and mine is the blue thing on the right. Cool eh?

Nathan got really into it, which I found quite endearing. He's not one for 'art' usually, you see.

Now tell me, is it wrong that my favorite Christmas song is the Chipmunk Song? Please tell me this is ok. I cannot stop listening to it.

Well I sincerely hope that all of your guys' holiday celebrating is going as fabulously as mine! Next week is my birthday and I will be 22.... AH. Any suggestions as to where I should go out to eat for my birthday dinner?

peace.

Oh, Hi December

Whelp December snuck up on me rather quickly, but I am glad it's here.

In December I have quite the plethora of big events to look forward to. For one, my birthday. Two, Christmas (durrr), and three, my anniversary! And you know what's absolutely crazy? All those things occur within ten days.

Yep. My birthday, Christmas, and my anniversary all in basically the same week.

Sadly I had no control over the timing of two of those events, and why on earth I chose to get married like four days after Christmas is beyond me.

So pretty much December is a super exciting month in my life.

The above photo is of my grandmother's Christmas 'Shelves'. Which, if she were a normal human being that would be a Christmas Tree. She is the only person who I know on this earth that owns one, and I have put it up for her every single year since the age of 13. Every inch of tinsel and lights must be thumb tacked, and then we set up whichever of her eight million nativity sets she wants on the shelves.

It's quite the affair, setting it up. But after it's all said and done, and my thumbs are throbbing from all of the thumb-tacking, it really does get me pumped up for the holidays. It's kind of weird, albeit unconventional, untraditional, and according to my uncle Bean, completely ugly, but I like that tree (shelves? whatever it is). It symbolizes Christmas to me, and I have been setting it up for so long that I can't imagine a year without it.

A couple of exciting things....

//I got a new wedding band! Shveet huh! You like? I have been wanting one for ages, and we've been looking around for a long time, but I never could find one I liked. This past week when we went up to Idaho though I finally found it! Eventually I want to do more of a stacked look and maybe get one or two more thin bands, but that obviously will have to happen over time. Money don't grow on trees, peeps.

//I got into nursing school!! I feel so blessed and grateful for this opportunity, and I have to say I honestly did not foresee my life taking this particular turn. But I am SO excited, and also a bit scared. That's normal, right?