Vienna

I've always considered myself a 90 year old trapped in a much younger body. Which explains why I love being a gerontology nurse so much. Those old people are my crew. 

Anyway that paragraph was just a roundabout way of me saying I love oldies music.

And right now this song is really speaking to me.

This year has been very challenging and difficult for me. I wrote a while ago about how I've been struggling with anxiety and depression. It truly is the plague of our generation.

Mentally and physically I've been really worn out. Worn down to the last fraying threads. It's hard to keep up in today's society. There is a lot expected of us young people. Gone are the days where you married your high school sweetheart, got a job and settled down in a cute little home in a cute little neighborhood. Things are more complicated than that. 

I guess I've just got too caught up in all the complications of life. The competition of life. Maybe these struggles I've been facing are God's way of saying ....You gotta slow down.

What I really mean is every time I start to feel a little bit better I try to take on way too much, and then God has to tug at me a little bit and bring me back down to earth and say 'Hey, you're doing too much right now.'

Why can't I own a house, have a career, be pregnant, rich and have finished my college degree all at 23?

HA. I mean when I write it out in a sentence like that it sounds kind of ludicrous but when you compare yourself to everyone else it seriously seems like you have to be at that point in life in your early twenties.

At the beginning of the summer we were honestly shopping for a house, I was in school full time, both of us working full time (actually me working tons of overtime), and planning starting a family. Not to mention still going to the gym multiple times a week and continuing my barrel racing lessons. And of course there's church obligations, and social obligations.

I mean my goodness. That's too much for any one person to handle.

I've crashed and burned again and God has looked me square in the eye and made it obvious to me that my plans right now aren't his plans. In a loving way, of course.

Slow down, you crazy chid.

You're so ambitious for a juvenile

But then if you're so smart, then tell me

Why are you still so afraid?

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?

You'd better cool it off before you burn it out

You've got so much to do

And only so many hours in a day

But you know that when the truth is told

That you can get what you want or you get old

You're gonna kick off before you even

Get halfway through

When will you realize, Vienna waits for you

Too bad, but it's the life you lead
You're so ahead of yourself that you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong
You know you can't always see when you're right

Slow down you crazy child
Take the phone off the hook and disappear for a while
It's alright, you can afford to lose a day or two (oooh)
When will you realize... Vienna waits for you?